Ready for a story with an “ick” factor that’s off the charts? Well, too damn bad – here it is. I owe thanks to Mr. Nice Guy for finding the disturbing story of Bruce McMahan, a millionaire investment broker who could have his pick of romantic partners. The one he really wanted, however, was the one he helped conceive. As Kelly Cramer from the Broward-Palm Beach New Times relates, McMahan and his daughter Linda Marie Hodge McMahan Schutt were “married” in a secret ceremony at Westminster Abbey.
How could a dad bring himself to do this, you may ask? Apparently, Mr. McMahan is quite the slut-puppy; he’s been spreading his seed around for a number of years, fathering a few children along the way. He didn’t even know that Linda existed until she was 18 years old. With no background of fatherly attachment upon which to draw, McMahan apparently thought she was bedpost-notch material. The faux marriage was the culmination of a years-long on-again, off-again sexual relationship. The whole shebang fell apart when McMahan’s fifth wife, whom he has divorcing, gained access to Linda’s Yahoo! account and uncovered the photos and email detailing the “passion that leads men straight to hell”, as McMahan himself put it. When he demanded that Linda deny his wife’s claim, she refused, leading to an explosion of court cases.
The legal wrangling quickly become nasty and disgusting; one of the pieces of evidence introduced was a vibrator that tested positive for both Schutt’s DNA and McMahan’s sperm (OH GOD MAKE IT STOP!!!). But all cases were apparently settled out of court very recently, and most of the documents sealed, with McMahan never copping to the incest allegations.
The New Times is taking a huge risk publishing this piece, which they did despite threats from McMahan’s lawyers. Good for them. While the daughter herself is no doubt flakier than a French croissant, there can be little doubt based on the evidence that Bruce McMahan went where no father should ever go. I’ve seen money and power do some fucked-up things to people, but this may well take the cake.