There is a use for a bicycle tire pump – it doesn’t involve a baby!

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Monroe man allegedly beat toddlers with bike tire pump
Monroe man allegedly beat toddlers with bike tire pump

WHY can I not find pictures of these warped animals? If I find one I’ll post it – I’m hoping he gets killed in jail, and I can post a morgue photo or one from his obit. I am so pissed off I can’t see straight right now. This is one of those times when I would happily choke the life out of an individual myself, with a smile on my face and a song in my heart.

Ivan J. Belardo, 37, was arrested for abusing his girlfriend’s babies (twins), and I have a few choice words for her as well, but I’ll get back to that later. Ivan claims he was looking for diapers so he could change the boys, when one of them walked up to him and hit him in the groin with a bicycle tire pump. Ivan claimed that the blow caused his penis to bleed, and he “lost control”. How did he lose control, you ask? He grabbed the tire pump and beat the living hell out of BOTH of the babies! Did I mention that the boys are only 22 months old? I have several things to say about the few facts I’ve already shared, but WAIT! There’s more! Both babies were beaten so severely that they had massive bruising on their groins, and one was bleeding from the penis. And did I mention the prick responsible had been doing heroin all day? No? Yes. He had.

I will go through my list of complaints against this man and my disbelief for his story one line at a time, so bear with me, please.

First he said one of them hit him so hard his cock bled. I sincerely doubt that, since having had six of my own, I have serious doubts that a 22 month old could strike a grown man hard enough to cause bleeding – even if he did use a bicycle pump. Children that age simply don’t have the upper body strength necessary to inflict that type of damage. Unless, of course, the little boy was playing with the pump on the roof of a two story building, and fell off, using Ivan’s dick to break his fall. Even then, any reasonable adult would see that it was an accident, and crawl away to soothe their hurt nads. Ivan, on the other hand, told authorities that the boy ‘looked like he meant to do it’. So, now Ivan can determine intent of a 2 year old from the way he looks? OK. Moving on….

Secondly, one child hits him, and he beats both of them? WHAT? Was he doing preemptive punishment on the innocent one, or did the twins run and he couldn’t tell them apart and so decided to beat both of them to ensure that the right one was punished? Or maybe…..the little boys ganged up on him……. Yeah, I bet that was it. The babies got together, planned the assault, carried it out, and were high-fiving each other when butt-munch came to exact revenge. Because we all know how these little babies can be. Vicious, evil, plotting babies.

Third – I’m not even a man, but I know that hitting a man in the groin will usually completely incapacitate him (especially if you hit him hard enough to make him bleed). I’ve only done that intentionally once in my life, and that was to get a guy off of me. It worked. By the time he recovered enough to walk, he had had time to reconsider his attempted assault, and walked away (and I didn’t even make HIM bleed, just curl up and cry). Smart guy. So the “I lost control” excuse doesn’t work for me either. By the time he recovered enough to go after the boys, he should have had enough time to realize that beating two toddlers with a tire pump was a bad idea. Not to mention that with the degree of pain a ball shot causes, no man should ever want to do that to another man, let alone a child. I hope they at least made this sperm spewer sterile with their shot – if it happened, which as I said already, I doubt sincerely.

Fourth – Did he not realize how hard he was hitting the children – or where? Of course he did! He had to have seen the damage he was doing, but he just kept on. Those babies had to be screaming! I hope to all heaven that somebody in lockup makes him scream louder and longer than he made those babies scream.

Fifth – why in the name of Satan’s underwear was this guy doing heroin when he was supposed to be responsible for two small children? Which leads me to my choice words for the mom….why the freak would any mother in her right mind leave two helpless babies with a known drug user? And no, I don’t believe that she didn’t know about it. If he had been doing it all day that day, then you know he sure as hell had done it before. You don’t go from clean (not a drug user at all) to doing heroin all day long one day. It doesn’t happen.

At least there’s one intelligent person in this whole saga….the judge set bail at $500,000.00. Way to go judge! I hope Ivan’s cellies take $500,000.00 worth of hide off his arse while he’s in there, too. I think the guy needs to have his groin beat until his thing falls off, and the woman should have the crap slapped out of her too. I can’t write any more.

Thanks go to me for this one too. I found, it I read it, I wrote it.

  • Angel

    And I hope that if it turns out he didn’t actually have an injury to begin with, that the doctor’s scalpel ‘accidentally slips’ and he sustains one during the exam. Amputation would be nice……

  • Anonymous

    I can’t wait for all the facts to come out on this one. His story being so idiotic that there is something very odd happening here, not just a run-of-the-mill b/f jackass beating a baby. Usually it’s pretty obvious what the abusers “motives” were but I’m at a loss here. I’d REALLY like to know if the police looked at this assholes little prick with a magnifying glass to see if he even had an injury.

    What an asshole.

  • Kathy

    Good points, Angel. The severity of the beatings described in the article make me sick. I agree about mom… you don’t leave your children with a heroin addict.

  • http://www.myspace.com/aprilamber April

    PENIS!!  BAN BAN!!! VILE!!!!  BLOATED!
     
    Ugh.  Enough.

  • http://thetrenchcoat.com Trench Reynolds

    BLESSING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Angel

    Sorry, y’all…..I can’t even find it in my heart to give the mom credit for the call to the cops or for not defending the jerk. Those are things we should EXPECT of a good mother, like feeding your kids and keeping them bathed…..have we ever given credit to another mother who deliberately left her kids in a dangerous situation (think about the two boys who died in the fire last year), just for feeding the kids or doing things a good mother SHOULD already do? No. We haven’t. She freakin’ left her kids with a high-as-a-kite druggie, and they were severely injured as a result. I just can’t work up any good feelings for this woman at all. If she has a valid reason for leaving them with a druggie (which I doubt) I’d like to hear it. Otherwise, her arse needs to be in jail for facilitating the abuse of her kids. Period.

    I still cringe every time I think of the pain those boys must have suffered. I look at my son and think “How?” How the devil could ANYBODY do this to a child? Poor babies.

  • jj

    And this guy? Hope he gets some good, old-fashioned prison justice.

  • jj

    No, shit. You can’t hide heroin use like that. The mom had to have known that he was a junkie. I’ll give her credit for calling the cops and not protecting her fuckmonkey, but she needs a huge WAKE UP CALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Morrigan Reighn

    i heard this on the news the other morning then couldnt find a thing about it in the paper later that day. they never showed a pic of the guy either. snohomish county and the monroe area are considered to be one of the most drug riddled areas in washington. i have no words to express my anger towards this waste of space. ill give mom a point for calling the cops but im gonna take 5 away for leaving the kids with him in the first place. you know she had to know he was using….and if he did indeed do heroin three time prior to her leaving bet your ass she would have known he was high. so no sympathy for me towards the mom. the kids, on the other hand, have been in my thoughts from the moment i heard about it.

  • http://www.myspace.com/aprilamber April

    Damn. I searched and searched for a pic… Nothing….

  • Anonymous

    On the one hand, the mother apparently did call the authorities rather than covering up for the abuser like so many women featured on this site. On the other hand, she left the children with him in the first place, and what she really should have done after discovering the abuse was rip his balls off and ram them down his throat.

    So no cookie for the mom, and hopefully a number of severe beatings and “intimate” shower sessions for the jackass boyfriend.