I got my pipe and smokes… I’m going for a stroll

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Toddler found wandering had marijuana pipe and cigarettes

Children are smart. Even this 19-month-old toddler is smarter then his hung over, low life parents.


On the morning of Saturday May 14th, a 19-month-old toddler woke up, hungry and dirty. While his parents continued to sleep off their hangover from the night before. The little boy decided he couldn’t take it anymore and made a run for it. He gathered up evidence and took off.


He was found roaming the streets of Bethlehem, Pa, wet from the rain with a pipe in one hand and a pack of cigarettes.


Someone thankfully found him around 8:30am, fed him and cleaned him up. They proceeded to search for his parents, but I am sure the little boy purposely gave them no help with that. It probably was one of the few times he was fed breakfast before 11am.


The police were called and the parents were located along with an additional pipe in the driveway (little boy dropped one during his escape?). The ‘parents’ Bryan Schneider, 46, and Katherine Main-Schneider, 32, were found and charged with endangering the welfare of a child and drug charges.

Bryan admitted that he and his wife were out partying the night before and when the baby woke that morning while they were asleep. No shit, really? I was afraid that there was some sort of flu going around that made a parent sleep through the needs of their child.  Bryan also produced a jar containing marijuana which he gave to the officer. I bet that ruined his idea of a wake and bake.


The little man was released to his grandparents. An officer noted that the baby may be returned to his parents eventually. Let’s hope that’s only after some parenting classes. The breeders are both free on $10,000 bail; I assumed a babysitter would have been much cheaper. But what do I know?

I have some advice for these two slags, lay off the pot. Seriously this child should not have to wait for his parents to have the munchies before he gets something to eat.

Thanks Sarah T for the tip!


**Thanks to itsmesg2003 for the write-up.**


  • Ace

    That was cute (the top part of the story I mean, not the parents’ behavior). I bet the baby is so smart that he usually opens the fridge and feeds himself (or at least I wish :(() I hope this incident freaks the hell out of them and they do take some parenting classes.

  • Muggle

     You’d think that a 46 year old man and a 32 year old woman would have figured out that if there’s a child around, you don’t do drugs, at least when they’re around.  Apparently not.

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  • Angies4kids

    Dumb & dumber.