Tag Archives: Alexander Edwards

Tatted-up tweens

Three people charged after two girls under 13 ‘tattooed without consent’

Tattooing leads to charge of child abuse in Campbell County

More charges filed in tattooing of children

3 supposed “adults” have been arrested and charged after two girls under the age of 13 were tattooed in Campbell County, Virginia. Now, I understand that tattoos are all the rage these days and aren’t just limited to bikies and sailors, but having them on pre-teen girls just won’t do.

Alexander Edwards is a  crappy babysitter

Alexander Edwards is a crappy babysitter

It’s understood that the girls were left in the care of Alexander Edwards (20) when he took it upon himself to ink the girls. His artistic attempts were met with charges of malicious wounding, abduction and child abuse.

Melissa Derp

Melissa Derp

When the girl’s mother Melissa Delp (Derp) (35) and her salami Daniel Janney (32) found out about the impromptu body art, they were mad. So mad that Janney decided to try to remove the ink with a hot razor blade. This MacGyver method of tattoo removal earnt him and his hot pocket charges of malicious wounding and child abuse also.

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Daniel Janney

Michael Mucklow, owner-operator of GO! Tattoo Removal, located in Kutztown PA, has offered his services to the girls for free. He uses non-invasive laser treatments to break down the ink pigments, and his clients usually have to return 10 to 12 times for the ink to be completely removed. What a kind fellow to help these girls get rid of the disfigurement that this wankstain inflicted on them. Those home tattooing kits are dodgy as fuck and the tattoos look like absolute crap. It’ll probably only take 1 or 2 goes to get the ink out.

The news sources list Edwards as being an “associate” of the broodmother and her sperm pump, but I can’t help thinking that he might actually be her bit on the side. In comparison to Janney, Edwards is younger and has more hair. But Janney also has those glasses that make him look a little bit more clever than Edwards and has a thinner face. But the dodgy home tattoos give the game away. She can’t decide who is more of a “catch”, but I bet she’s willing to trade Janney in for the younger model.

That’s enough speculation. All three of them need a dick tattooed onto their faces. And it’s probable that all three of them had their brains removed with a hot razor blade some time ago.