Tag Archives: April Flood Megan Long

Methtards in the News…

So this is a 1st for me – I have so many stories that involve retards on meth (aka methtards for you newbies) that I am consolidating them all into one long string.
Strap in. Enjoy.

Grandmother of child burned in meth lab arrested
Child found burned leads to meth arrest

Straight outta Saraland, Al we have 49-year old grandma – Juanita Sue Martin. (she doesn’t really look like a Juanita, does she?). Juanita Sue isn’t the kind of grandma that bakes cookies for her little grandson, or picks him up early from daycare to spoil him for the afternoon, or the kind that takes him to the zoo. She’s the kind of grandma who has her grandson for 2 days, with severe burns on his body, and doesn’t seek medical attention for him.

Now, why wouldn’t she take him to the doctor? Who could she possibly be protecting? I’ll give you no guesses and tell you that the meth pipe doesn’t fall far from the tree. The boy’s mother, Amber Nicole Lazzell (28), was arrested 1st in this case. Cops were sent to her house for a welfare check on the boy and they discovered his burns.  They questioned the mother and she claimed that he’d been burnt by common household cleaning products.  But those pesky cops knew better after finding several bottles fashioned as reactionary vessels with off white residue in them, two plastic baggies with meth inside, digital scales and three glass smoking devices with burned residue. They also found 18 pseudoephedrine pills and a plastic bag containing an unknown plant material. They put 2 and 2 together and got a meth lab and off momma went to jail.  Grandma was arrested shortly thereafter, after cops learned that the boy had also been with her with these burns. 

Momma Meth

Seems that these meth mommas both have extensive wrap sheets that consist of various drug-related charges. This was Juanita Sue’s 9th arrest.   Lazzell was arrested and charged with chemical endangerment of a child, unlawful possession, distribution and manufacturing of a controlled substance. While Grandmomma Meth was arrested for reckless endangerment for not reporting his injuries.

 I’m not sure who called the police to do a welfare check and I also don’t know how they knew that he’d been with his grandma for 2 days – and frankly I don’t care. I’m going to pretend that it was a concerned citizen who is basically all kinds of awesome in my book today. I visualize this person as a caped crusader who flies from house to house in Saraland, Al looking for methtards to report. Bravo, Sir/Madam.

Pair arrested after explosive meth fire, child removed from home

In Evansville, IN, 2 methtards have been arrested because their home exploding due to the manufacturing of meth. The police were called to assist the Evansville FD with a fire at the home of  Nickolas J. Beshears, 31, and Carrie L. Hooper, 38 around 8pm. The caller reported seeing an explosion at the back of the duplex where these two lived. Cops found many meth-making materials on site when they got there.

They also recovered a 3-year old child in the meth lab explosion. There is no word on the current state of the child, but that he/she is in protective custody.

 ps – nice neck tattoo.

Nikolas and Carrie – methtards a go go

UPDATE: Children found near one pot meth lab 
Westside – UPDATE: Children found near one pot meth lab

Methtards a plenty!

 How about that? Two separate stories about methtard parents from Evansville, IN. What are the odds?

Misty Voyles, 28, Christopher Dann, 33, Chad Adams, 24 and Patrick Smith, 48 were all arrested in August on meth charges. Voyles and Dann each face three charges of neglect as well since their 3 children were present in the “one pot” meth lab that they had going on. Now, I had to google that shit because I had no idea what a one pot meth lab was. 

According to my BFF, Google, a one pot meth lab is the easiest and quite possibly most dangerous way of making meth. Using the one-pot method means that meth cooks can make meth in a single container which is generally flipped upside-down to cause the chemical reaction needed to turn several toxic ingredients into meth. This method generally produces lower quality meth and in smaller quantity, but add an extra element of danger to the process. Well, how about that? Learn something new every day of the fucking year!

The three kids were taken into protective custody after they were found in this meth lab. Neighbors called cops reporting a suspicious smell coming from upstairs floor of the rental house. I’ll always give a shout out to a nosey, amazing neighbor – thank you nosey neighbor!

Oh, and this wasn’t Voyles first time. She was arrested in July 2008 for being found at a meth lab as well.

Baby in DHR custody; one suspect still at large 

Hazmat crew

Now back to Alabama, again what are the odds? This story has my mouth agape, I can’t lie. And there are few things that have that affect on me.  Well, more than a few, but let’s move on.

Acting on a tip, cops spent hours breaking up a meth lab in Morgan County, Alabama. After arriving on site, they found a 5-week old infant in the house.  Not only did they find a baby in a meth lab, but they also found a 40-pound explosive device.  The bomb squad was called to remove the explosive, a ‘crater charge’ which was live and armed. The bomb squad removed the explosive which according to them would have leveled not only the house, but anyone within 300 feet, if it had detonated. Reminder – there was a 5-week old baby in there with that thing!

When cops got to the lab, the methtards scattered like scared rats and some of them got away – cops only made 6 arrests. There are at least 2 or 3 that got away, including a man named “Shorty” (aka Kerry Dale Humphries).  If you know him, turn him in.

No word in the articles who the parents are of the 5-week old or if they were caught. I know I can’t pinpoint an exact Bad Breeder in this story, but some asshole had their 5-week old baby in a methlab with an explosive onsite. Whoever they are, nameless or not, this baby still deserves to get written about.

Clarksville couple arrested for making meth. Five young children found near lab materials

Methtard face x 2

I heart anonymous tips, I really do. Especially when these anonymous tips end  up with assholes like Damen A. Gohl (31) and Breah M. Watteau, (30) getting arrested for endangering their 6 children – ages 6 to 14. But let’s get to the details, shall we?

An (awesome) anonymous tipster called the police about a possible methlab in Clarksville, IN (damn how far is that from Evansville?) at the America’s Best Inn and Suites.  They responded to the call only to find a 14-year old girl outside the room shoving something into her bra. She eventually showed them the bottle containing five Lortabs and a baggie with powder, which tested positive for meth. When they asked her why she had that, she replied that she was trying to keep her dad from getting in more trouble. What a sweet, poor thing. Covering up for your fucked up father? New low, Damen, new fucking low. You have to be pretty pathetic and fucked up for your 14-year old to hide drugs from the cops for you.

Once gaining entry into the hotel room after a signed consent from Damen, they found a cooler full of items that were used to manufacture meth – all tested positive. Not only did they find this cooler full of goodies, but they also found 5 more children (ages 6-10) lying on the bed within feet of this cooler.  So wait, just making sure I have my math right here…. you are 31 and 30 and have 6 kids, the oldest of which is 14. All 8 of you live in some skanky “America’s Best Inn”? Wow. This weighs so heavy on my heart to learn that 6 children are living this way. That the poor 14-year old girl is so used to this life that she tried to protect her shithead,  junky father. 

All of the kids were taken into protective custody and then later released to the grandmother. Mom and Dad were arrested on preliminary charges of class B felony manufacturing meth; class D felony possession of meth; class D felony maintaining a common nuisance; class D felony possession of a controlled substance; class A misdemeanor possession of paraphernalia; and six counts of class C felony child endangerment. They will appear in court for the preliminary charges.

I’m going to say let’s hope these 2 parents clean their shit up and become better parents to their 6 kids, but who am I kidding? Instead, I’ll hope that these 6 kids break the cycle and go off to become successful and healthy adults.

Thanks to Amanda for all the tips for the stories above!

And saving the most heinous for last:
Death Investigation of Murray Co. Pregnant Teen 

RIP Megan Long

It’s so hard for me to wrap my head around this one, so gimme a minute.  From what I can understand from the articles I read this is a story of a selfish, piece of shit woman named April Flood who jeopardized her pregnant daughter’s health by asking her to shove a baggie of meth up her vagina during a traffic stop. April didn’t want to get caught with the meth, so she had her 19-year old pregnant daughter hide it up in herself for her. Later, when they got to their destination and she took the baggie back out, it was empty. Seems it was absorbed into her body.

19-year old mom-to-be, Megan Long and the baby died later that night at the hospital. Meghan’s boyfriend (who was present during the traffic stop), claimed that Megan started having seizure like symptoms that night.  Doctors and cops are awaiting the toxicology report to determine if this is what exactly killed her. 

Now, her mother is claiming that yes – she was in the car, but she is denying that the meth was hers or that she asked her daughter to conceal it. She says that the meth belonged to Eddie Duke (the boyfriend). She showed cops a text that said, “I’m about to make a trip or call for delivery” – referring to the drugs. In the 911 call Duke tells dispatchers he doesn’t know how much meth was in Megan’s system. Megan’s father, Mickey Long, firmly believes that meth belonged to Flood. He claims that Flood admitted it to him, that she said “I just asked her to stuff it.”

I’m not sure that even with the toxicology report that they’ll be able to pinpoint who the meth belonged to or who had her hide it inside herself. I think April still deserves a spot on BB.net because she is a mother and she was involved in some degree of either asking her to hide the drugs or she knew that her daughter dated a man that did meth and he texted her about it.

Megan had a cardiac arrest shortly before she was admitted to the hospital. Doctors tried to save the baby, but it died 2 days later. “It’s probable that the baby died during that cardiac arrest.” Megan passed away the next day. She also had a young son who will now have to live his life without his mother.

RIP Megan and your unborn baby. The world never got to see your beautiful smile!

Thanks to Rhonda for the tip.


Phew – that was a lot. I don’t know that I’ve ever read so many stories about fuck-ups on meth in my whole life, nevermind in the same day. Meth is a disgusting and awful drug. To me, it just wreaks white trash and low-life nastiness. Whenever I see a house with the shades closed in the middle of the day and 6 cars parked outside, I always wonder if they’re cooking up some meth in there. Methtards don’t normally have jobs, or teeth for that matter. I’m so happy to report that 6 of my 7 stories had no dead babies. My heart breaks for all the children in these stories, but especially for Megan and her unborn baby.  When are parents going to learn? I guess never, and that’s what keeps us here on BB – reporting all the worthless parents out there. Hug and love your babies tonight everyone, I know I will.